Exhausted and Encouraged

I'm going to be so wiped out today. But, at the same time, I feel so good.

Last night I received the final three chapters of edits in my email. I have to review the chapters (accept or reject suggestions, answer questions, fill in gaps where my editor requests more information) and send them back. The editor then reviews my reviews of his edits.

I got these final chapters last night at almost 9:30, after John and I had returned home from walking. By the time I showered and got into my jammies, it was after 10:00. I wanted to review all three chapters, but I was so tired I just couldn't do it. I reviewed one and then went to bed around 11:00 thinking that I probably couldn't get the chapters back to my editor until tonight, since I volunteer at the church office today.

Apparently, that was unacceptable to my subconscious mind. I slept soundly for a little over three hours and then was wide awake, thinking about those reviews. I knew I needed to go back to sleep so I could make it through the day, but it wasn't happening. So I got up and reviewed the last three chapters. The good news is that I'm done and I won't delay my editor's progress. The bad news is that it is almost 6:00 and I'm afraid that if I go back to bed, I will oversleep. I usually leave for the office between 9:00 and 9:30. I guess I could take my chances and be a little late, but I hate to do that.

My editor says he will begin typesetting this week. I am at the point of needing to call the online publisher and set up my account. My cover artist says I will be receiving the cover design electronically any moment now. I'm wondering if it's possible I will actually make my August 31 deadline. I think it's a safer assumption that the book will be published the first week or two in September. I have to have a proof text printed so I can try to avoid even one small typo making it into print. This means I probably still have to read and review the entire book two more times before publishing.

Today is a sad anniversary for us. Six years ago today, John's daughter, Brittany Taylor Howerton, passed away after suffering a fatal asthma attack that escalated into cardiac arrest. The attack happened early in the morning of August 11 and she died on August 12 (although John feels like he lost her on the 11th because she never regained consciousness and was only kept alive by machines). John told me last night that he has awakened at the same time she called for him that morning every subsequent August 11 since. He told me that only after I brought up the date and said, "I never know whether or not I should say something, but I know you have also been thinking about Brittany and what day this is. I wanted you to know I was thinking about her all day." That's when he told me he wakes up at the same time every year on August 11th. When a person has lost someone close to them - especially their child - we should never be reluctant to mention that we're remembering too. There is no chance of "reminding" someone of a loss they haven't already been feeling.

As you might imagine, I'm really tired both physically and mentally this morning. Waking up at 2:00 am doesn't help. Endless revisions are exhausting. And it's the anniversary of a sad day in our lives. We miss Britt. I know that John's heart is heavy remembering this day six years ago.

However, I'm also feeling good about the book and its message. Especially on this day, it means so much to read words about the true Gospel, grace and the assurance of salvation through faith alone in a risen Savior; for me, for you and for our Brittany.


Deb Light said…
I'm so happy Shari that Whirlpool came through for you!!YEAH!!You deserve it!!ENJOY!!

God Bless,