Forgive to Move Forward ... this includes forgiving yourself!
I started listening to an audio book devotional this year, Live in Grace, Walk in Love (Bob Goff). I love it so much that I'm already into December before the end of February.
On Day 300, Goff wrote about forgiveness. He said, "Every time we won't forgive each other, we act like grace doesn't exist." He went on to reference the quote we've all heard about unforgiveness being like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. He said it made him wonder if we could start this quote: "Forgiveness is like drinking poison for someone else and you both live." I liked that.
He went on to explain, "Here's what I mean. If you've been alive for more than a couple of years, someone has probably hurt you in some way at some time. Maybe it was a big way that made your life feel off balance for a little while. Maybe it was a small way that you just can't seem to get over. Whatever it is, perhaps it left you in a place where forgiveness is hard to come by. The hardest part about giving forgiveness is when the person who is wrong doesn't ask for it. We should give it anyway. If we don't, we'll have the poison of unforgiveness flowing through our veins and making our whole life feel sick. It doesn't have to stay this way, though. In a sense, forgiveness isn't like drinking poison. It's more like giving you both the antidote. Forgiveness is an invitation to humble ourselves and turn toward the people who have hurt us. It opens the door for grace to come in and surprise us with a renewed sense of love and commitment to each other. But even if that doesn't happen, forgive anyway. Every time we forgive each other, we create a little more space for love. And it's this new space that has the power to change us. What's keeping you from forgiveness?"
I am now 44 days beyond Day 300. But I keep going back to it in my thoughts. And this morning I rewound and listened to it again. Then I made the connection with this meme I recently shared about judging ourselves.
If you're like me, it's much easier to forgive others than it is to forgive yourself. I relive my own mistakes far more often than the mistakes of others (even those who have hurt me). But shaming and condemning ourselves is just another form of "acting like grace doesn't exist." God wants us to move forward. Guess who wants us to stay stuck in the failures of the past? Not our friend, but our enemy.
I want to encourage you, as I encourage myself, to let go of self-condemning thoughts. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 4, "...I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me."
I have grown in the area of caring less about the judgments projected onto me by others. I have not grown proportionately when it comes to letting go of self-judgment. But this quote from Bob Goff is one I intend to keep in mind as I endeavor to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with my God.
On Day 300, Goff wrote about forgiveness. He said, "Every time we won't forgive each other, we act like grace doesn't exist." He went on to reference the quote we've all heard about unforgiveness being like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. He said it made him wonder if we could start this quote: "Forgiveness is like drinking poison for someone else and you both live." I liked that.
He went on to explain, "Here's what I mean. If you've been alive for more than a couple of years, someone has probably hurt you in some way at some time. Maybe it was a big way that made your life feel off balance for a little while. Maybe it was a small way that you just can't seem to get over. Whatever it is, perhaps it left you in a place where forgiveness is hard to come by. The hardest part about giving forgiveness is when the person who is wrong doesn't ask for it. We should give it anyway. If we don't, we'll have the poison of unforgiveness flowing through our veins and making our whole life feel sick. It doesn't have to stay this way, though. In a sense, forgiveness isn't like drinking poison. It's more like giving you both the antidote. Forgiveness is an invitation to humble ourselves and turn toward the people who have hurt us. It opens the door for grace to come in and surprise us with a renewed sense of love and commitment to each other. But even if that doesn't happen, forgive anyway. Every time we forgive each other, we create a little more space for love. And it's this new space that has the power to change us. What's keeping you from forgiveness?"
I am now 44 days beyond Day 300. But I keep going back to it in my thoughts. And this morning I rewound and listened to it again. Then I made the connection with this meme I recently shared about judging ourselves. If you're like me, it's much easier to forgive others than it is to forgive yourself. I relive my own mistakes far more often than the mistakes of others (even those who have hurt me). But shaming and condemning ourselves is just another form of "acting like grace doesn't exist." God wants us to move forward. Guess who wants us to stay stuck in the failures of the past? Not our friend, but our enemy.
I want to encourage you, as I encourage myself, to let go of self-condemning thoughts. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 4, "...I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me."
I have grown in the area of caring less about the judgments projected onto me by others. I have not grown proportionately when it comes to letting go of self-judgment. But this quote from Bob Goff is one I intend to keep in mind as I endeavor to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with my God.
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